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There’s No Comparison: Canadian Football Is Better Than American Football

The Canadian football season is getting ready to start very soon. I cannot wait. And, I am here to tell you straight out. The Canadian Football League (CFL) is far better than the National Football League (NFL). There is no comparison.

I am not the only person who thinks so, and every once in awhile you will see someone support the CFL publically. Some people will even trot out the truth found in such things as accuracy, numbers, science, and reason to make their points. Not me.

Here are my five reasons why Canadian football is so much better than American football.

Reason #1: CFL Players Simply Aren’t As Good.

Canadian football players are, by-and-large (that was a pun intended), smaller than American football players. They are quicker and move more quickly over a larger field. They were not all the stars at their University. They didn’t get millions of dollars to sign. If they don’t make it in Ottawa, they are probably teaching a gym class in a rural school in Alabama. This is their last stop before selling life insurance or sheet metal fabrication. In short, I think they care more. It shows.

Reason #2: Even Rain Man Can’t Keep Track of People Running Around.

There is a great scene in the movie Rain Man, where the suave Tom Cruise and the autistic Dustin Hoffman engage in the following exchange. A box of toothpicks drops on the floor and the Dustin Hoffman (Rain Man) glances at the floor and immediately counts them accurately. The dialogue goes:

Raymond: 246 total.
Charlie: How many?
Sally Dibbs: 250 (according to the box)
Charlie: Pretty close.
Sally Dibbs: There’s four left in the box.

Well, here’s saying that Rain Man – for all his brilliant and weird skills – could not take into account the complexity of the CFL. It moves too quickly. Compared to the NFL, where backfield in motion looks either completely mechanical or is called a penalty, the CFL is like crazy people running around. The classic Monty Python 100 Yard Dash for People with No Sense of Direction. There is so much motion that it is impossible to keep track of. That’s exciting, opens the field, increases scoring, keeps all games close. In the CFL, it is actually possible to come from 30 points down to win a game. The CFL moves: the NFL stalls and stutters.

Reason #3: A CFL Fan Can Watch Every Single CFL Game

Every CFL can watch every single CFL game every single CFL week, and still have time for a family. It’s great that Canada – one of the biggest countries geographically in the world – has a much smaller population than the United States. There are only 9 CFL teams, because only 9 cities are big enough. Even then, two CFL teams are named after whole provinces – Saskatchewan and British Columbia. [Although it seems that the New England Patriots try to lay claim to a whole area of the USA.]

Anyway, there are only four CFL games a week – almost enough to binge on, but really only a three-hour commitment each day for four days. By the time you are done watching, you can know all the players on all the teams. Try that NFL. Tell the truth, does anyone know anyone who plays for the Jacksonville Jaguars?

Reason #4: Saskatchewan Has The Best Sports Fans In The World – Bar None.

In Saskatchewan, the conversation goes like this.

“Marge, you done husking corn? I parked the tractor; let’s paint ourselves green, put watermelons on our head, and go watch the Riders beat-up the Alouettes” (Which, for people who don’t know the CFL, is the name of the Montreal football team, not the name of a small wren-like bird).

Anyone who has ever gone to ANY CFL stadium sees green-painted Saskatchewan Roughrider fans (all wearing John Deere hats) absolutely make John Belushi’s Animal House look tame. They yell – they scream – that party – they travel in caravans. They are more than half the fans at away games. Interestingly, the team colors became green and white colors in 1948 because team’s management bought a set of football uniforms from a sports surplus store in Chicago—the only uniforms the team could afford. It’s been watermelon since.

I once thought I would get rich by marketing a shampoo called “Rider Pride,” which had essence of watermelon and lime green in color. I know I was right – but sadly I never followed through.

Reason #5: The Middle Linebacker For The Edmonton Eskimos Came To My House For Lunch.

If I were the King of Sports, I would model every team in every sport – from the NBA to Major League Baseball – on the funding model of the CFL. CFL players play football in Canada because they love playing football. They make less money by far –the highest paid CFL player makes less than $500,000 CAD a year. The CFL average salary is barely over $80,000 a year – that is a salary blue-collar Canadians can identify with.

And, as a University Professor at the University of Alberta, I taught two CFL players during my time there. One came to my kids’ school to talk and brought some other players with him, and actually came to our house for lunch afterward. Good guys – in the community – eating grilled cheese on whole wheat. I like that.

I know there are many other reasons why CFL football is far superior to NFL football – but here are five of mine. Just sayin’.

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